


the unicorn is my bitch (and i’m gavin’s)

by andybrnards



Category: Rooster Teeth Productions RPF
Genre: Blow Jobs, M/M, Smut, penis alert, too much swearing, unicorn abuse
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-01-17
Updated: 2013-01-17
Packaged: 2017-11-25 20:27:01
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,038
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/642651
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/andybrnards/pseuds/andybrnards
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Michael agreed to play clop in a livestream because he’s a fucking masochist. And Gavin just likes Michael when he’s angry.</p>
            </blockquote>





	the unicorn is my bitch (and i’m gavin’s)

They wanted a fucking ragequit livestream, fine. The fuckers get one. Do they even understand how much editing and planning and how many fucking hours of footage he has to seep through before getting an entire 5 fucking minutes of usable footage? No, of course they fucking don’t, so here he fucking is; having to do a goddamn livestream of CLOP. And they want him to just keep trying until he fucking beats it. And oh Geoff with his “wow isn’t that a great fucking idea. Maybe Michael will actually beat a flash-game for the first time in his miserable worthless life” HAHAHAHA. Fuck you.

Seriously? He’d rather fucking get his insides torn out through his asshole, but the audience wants it so the audience gets it. Maybe they’ll want to see him committing suicide by disembowelment next time too, fuckers.

So here he is, clop open and recording, microphone on, and a stream of dipshits commenting and making bets on how long before Michael gives up. Michael groans and leans into the microphone.

“Hey assholes. You asked for it, you fuckers are getting it. A livestream of me fucking playing clop. Thanks a lot, douchenozzles.”

He stares at the screen. He can’t fucking read this. What kind of font is this, what dipshit picked this? “What. The. Fuck.” The noise of a horse whinny repeated.

“What is this piece of shit you fuckers are making me play? What’s the asshole doing in the fucking corner? Whispering sweet nothings into that fucking unicorns ear? Is this some kind of hentai game where he starts fucking the unicorn? Could have fucking WARNED ME.”

He clicks his mouse and sees the prompt on the screen. Hj kl. What. Oh no. Oh no. “ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME?!”

Michael hits the buttons and the unicorn does a backflip and impales his horn into the ground, the man on screen stating that “THOU HAST THE SKILL AND GRACE OF A COW” and prompting a restart. Fuck. NICE COMEBACK FUCKHEAD.

“I thought I was fucking done with this shit after QWOP. OH NO, OF FUCKING COURSE NOT. Fucking NOT AT ALL.”

He mashes the buttons again, the horse making it a few feet before flipping in the air.

He raises his voice, mocking the viewers “MICHAEL, MICHAEL DO A RAGEQUIT FOR CLOP IT’LL BE FUCKING HILARIOUS AND AMAZING AND IT HAS A FUCKING UNICORN AND WE ALL KNOW THAT YOU’RE A GIANT FUCKING FAGGOT THAT LOVES PONIES. PLAY CLOP! FINE, FUCKERS. I’M FUCKING PLAYING CLOP!”

Michael’s fucking positive his voice is going to be hoarse by the end of this stream.

His next few tries, he doesn’t make it far at all, and he’s slamming his hands onto the keyboard in frustration.

“HOW THE FUCK AM I SUPPOSED TO DO THIS. HE FUCKING DOES A BACKFLIP OVER A ROCK AND SNAPS HIS NECK IN HALF JESUS FUCK.”

The stream is torn between users supporting him and users calling him a faggot for not being able to control a unicorn properly.

And again, and again the unicorn falls to its fucking death at Michael’s hands. He’s been screaming nonstop. This game is fucking stupid and whoever fucking recommended this deserves to be playing this shit, not him.

“HK JL HK JL HK JL. FUCK THESE STUPID FUCKING KEYS YOU HAVE TO CROSS YOUR FINGERS TO HIT THEM RIGHT BECAUSE IF YOU DO IT THE NORMAL COMFORTABLE WAY, HE FLIPS INTO THE FUCKING STRATOSPHERE IN FUCKING SECONDS. BUT THEN YOUR FINGERS GET TANGLED UP AND THE STUPID UNICORN DIES ANYWAY.”

This thing doesn’t even deserve to be called a fucking unicorn. It can’t fucking move on its own, but oh, how it moves so fucking gracefully for sure FUCK.

“STUPID FUCKING HORSE,” Michael screams into the mic as the unicorn tumbled down a hill, “YOU DON’T EVER DESERVE TO BE CALLED A UNICORN YOU FUCKING PRICK.”

He was fucking so close, so goddamn close to ripping the keyboard out and throwing it out the fucking window. To finding whoever recommended this game and punching them in the face.

He hit the keys at mach speed; the unicorn making it farther than it had ever been before. When it fucking tripped over a rock. Again.

“Goddamnit! Piece of shit!!!”

This is the final mother fucking straw, he is fucking done. Why the goddamn hell had he agreed to play this stupid game?! It’s such a complete piece of shit that was created by complete fucktard. 

And then the door opened and slammed shut just as quickly. Nobody comes in when he’s in the middle of a ragequit, because what kind of fucking idiot would do that? Oh right. There is one fucking idiot that would.

“Gavin. Go. Away.”

Immediately the stream was filled with comments of “hello Gavin! Hey Gavino!”

It pisses Michael off.

Gavin holds a stupid fruity drink to his lips, grinning while taking a sip. Stupid fucking idiot.

“Hey Michael, how’s the game going?”

“How the fucking hell does it look like its fucking going Gavin?”

“Fabulously.” Gavin says, a big grin on his face as he steps closer to Michael and his screen, peering at the stream chat.

“I’m so done with this game. Seriously, fuck this shithole game.” Michael grumbles, smashing the keyboard with his fist, the unicorn on screen balancing precariously by its horn.

“I’m sure you can handle it, love.” His empty glass is placed on Michael’s desk, and Gavin’s hands somehow find their way down Michael’s shoulder. 

“Of course I can fucking handle it, you dumbshit. It’s just fucking stupid.” Then to the audience, Michael grumbles “Whichever one of you FUCKERS thinks I can’t beat this stupid FUCKING game is going to be sorely disappointed.”

“Atta boy, Michael” Gavin announces before moving his head close to Michael’s ear and lowering his voice to a whisper. “If you’re good, I’ll give you a reward.” Gavin then attaches his mouth to Michael’s fucking neck, eliciting a fucking yelp from him. Michael doesn’t fucking yelp.

“God-fucking-damnit, Gavin.” Michael let out a squeak as Gavin sucks hard on his neck, before slowly licking his way up to Michael’s ear. 

“If you stop, then I’ll stop.” His mouth attaches itself back to Michael’s neck, his teeth nibbling on Michael’s flesh.

Michael writhes in his seat and hisses angrily, “Ugh, you fucker.” 

Michael’s hands return to the keys and as hard as he tries, there is no way he can keep his concentration on this game, and there is no way he can be funny while doing it. He plays in silence for a bit as Gavin continued his onslaught to his neck. He’s going to come out of this fucking covered in hickies, for fucking sure. He groans angrily and says something about stupid fucking unicorns, but he’s trying to keep playing, trying to make that stupid fucking animal clop its way to the goddamn end.

Gavin’s arms find their way around Michael’s torso, slipping underneath the thin fabric of the t-shirt. His hands run up and down Michael’s chest before settling one on Michael’s right nipple, tweaking it slightly.

“Fuuuuuuckkk”, Michael whines, his fingers slipping from the keys causing the unicorn to snap its neck in half once more. And he was so fucking close. And now he’ll have to start all over again. “FUCK,” he exclaims into the mic. He doesn’t fucking give a shit about the game, not anymore, not like he ever did. But he can’t stop because he needs more of Gavin. He wants more of Gavin everywhere and all over him.

Gavin’s hands continue to trail down Michael’s stomach until they come to his fly. Michael shoots a look down at Gavin, taking his eyes away from the screen for long enough to destroy the unicorn once more. What is he doing what is he doing what the fuck is he doing?

The Englishman shoots a cheeky grin and murmurs “Don’t stop, Michael.”

He pulls Michael’s chair out slightly, enough to maneuver himself between Michael’s knees, before dropping to his own. 

How the fuck is he supposed to concentrate now? He tries to be funny, tries to be frustrated at the right points, but all he is is horny and all he wants is for Gavin to fuck him hard against the desk.

Michal tries not to make a sound as Gavin palms his dick through his boxers. Tries to stay enthralled and focused on beating this fucking game. People in the chat are asking where Gavin went and Michael just continues swearing about the fucking unicorn.

“FUCK THIS GAME AND FUCK WHOEVER MADE IT,” Michael shouts as Gavin breathes hotly against the piece of fabric between them. “I AM GOING TO TAKE THIS UNICORN OUT BACK AND FUCKING SHOOT IT. FUCKING OLE’ YELLER ALL OVER AGAIN. THIS STUPID ASSHOLE WHISPERING IN MY EAR DESERVES TO HAVE HIS UNICORN BOYFRIEND KILLED.”

Michael doesn’t make sense anymore. Did he ever? He can’t take it and he just wants to stop and cut the fucking stream, but people aren’t leaving. People think he’s close to beating it. But the only thing Michael is close to is cumming in his pants. 

The idiot between his legs tugs his jeans down as far as he can and mouths Michael’s cock through his boxers. Gavin’s breath is hot and his mouth is wet and Michael is so fucking done.

This isn’t fucking fair. This is stupid bullshit and Michael is so ready to tear his own hair out. Fuck Gavin and fuck this game and fuck everyone on this fucking planet.

Michael slams a fist down on the keyboard as the unicorn snaps its legs in half once more.

The next thing Michael knows is that his boxers are down and there’s tongue everywhere. Gavin’s tongue is licking every inch of Michael and he just wants to scream and throw the computer out the window.

And now his dick is in Gavin’s mouth. He’s hard and aching and the feeling of Gavin’s lips wrapped around him is making his brain melt.

And maybe his brain has melted. Maybe this isn’t even happening because he can’t stop fucking playing clop. Because he can’t stop hitting buttons on the keyboard and trying to get a stupid dumbtarded unicorn to backflip its way toward a ballerina what even the fuck is supposed to be at this ending? And he has no idea because all he’s thinking about is Gavin’s tongue and Gavin’s mouth and Gavin’s lips.

One of Michael’s hands makes it into Gavin’s messy hair, gripping it tight and pushing himself deeper inside of the other man’s mouth. His hair is soft and his lips are soft and everything is soft and smooth and perfect. And Michael’s got one hand working Gavin’s head and the other maneuvering the stupid unicorn, and he’s just an endless stream of curse words and insults into the microphone and the fucking unicorn is going to be his fucking bitch, just like he’s Gavin’s.

Michael comes hard into Gavin’s willing mouth, and he’s breathless and swearing and his fist pounds against the keyboard and he fucking hates everything, especially this game, these fans, and fucking Gavin.

“Fuck this shit!! I’m fucking done with this shit game. I quit. FUCK YOU ALL!” Michael shouts before cutting the stream and glaring down at Gavin. The idiot’s lips are red and full and wet with cum. 

The idiot just licks his lips and grins up at him and Michael is pretty sure there is no part of him that doesn’t want to punch Gavin in the face. He grips Gavin’s collar tight and lifts the man up to his face. They kiss and it’s rough and hot and exactly what Michael has been wanting to fucking do since this shit started. Michael can taste himself and it’s weird and familiar and driving him crazy.

“You fucking prick,” Michael huffs out as Gavin pulls away, “you could have ruined the whole fucking stream.”

“But Michael, I was bored. And, you’re so hot when you’re angry.” Gavin licks his lips and smiles, all teeth and sincerity.

“Really? Well maybe I should show you exactly how fucking pissed off this shitty fucking game made me.”


End file.
